It’s Tuesday night I should be at Zumba. But last night after a little bit of exercise I started shaking, I had already eaten supper but I topped off my night with some pasta and seemed to settle down again.
Tonight I decided to stay home. I had trouble staying awake after the alarm went off this morning. And work was not focused and I felt weird.
There’s a bunch of things
I got a rejection letter for my poetry last night and in the letter included a lot of great information. Like any large amount of great information, I have to process it. It has to run through my body a few days and I have to decide what I take and use and how much. It also puts me in my place a bit, telling me my poetry, or whatever it is, needs more work and editing.
I’m exercising and eating differently and perhaps this has an affect on the large amount of medication I’m on. Maybe it needs to be managed a bit differently. So I’m going to call the DR in the morning and see if that is something I need to worry about.
All this Donald Trump shit is giving me nightmares; I’m arguing a women’s right to her body in my sleep.
I’ve been busy the last couple weeks and maybe it just got to me today. Maybe I just needed to sit down and write and work shit out, so here I am
We Have a curse jar at work and that has been causing me anxiety. You just can’t replace the word asshole with poop head it doesn’t work. I calmed down a bit when I closed my own jar of collected change.
I don’t make much money and that affects me a lot too.
Last night I decided I just wasn’t good enough to go anywhere. Not good enough to make much money, not good enough to be a real singer, not good enough to be a real poet/writer.
SO that’s what I have to work with perhaps it’s a salad of all of it put together. And I just needed to relax.
I feel like it’s a Tim Curry day. When I can relate to every face every character he has created and understand the wildness in his eyes.