Friday, March 9, 2012

Task: The World Wants More Self Confidence

Today I was reminded of the theatre department. Of looking around the building for a secluded place to work on the chosen plays, something as well read as Miss Julie, or as homegrown as “The Chair” or plan a performance. Today we met in the community room at the local grocery store, which we probably won’t do again, as there were a few too many announcements that cheese was on sale and the blue truck had its lights on in the parking lot. We got together and planned the creative outings of next week, whose car we’ll be taking where is this place that we’re going to anyway? I guess I’m not the only one who has never been to our destination. Then we told our stories. I’ve written my story, most of us had, and mine clocks in at 15 minutes, that’s a handful to memorize and tell with confidence. This was the first time I’d shared it and its size and delivery overwhelmed me.

I learned today that I had confidence of my story on the page, but now I need confidence in the telling part of it. I learned that I know the plot of the story, but now it has to be well told, with eloquence. I learned that some parts could be dropped out. I learned that I have to stand up in my apartment and do some voice exercises and really let my voice be heard, let my story be heard. I need the confidence that my story is worth telling, that my words are worth hearing. I know that what my story is and it’s my time to tell the story I’ve lived until now.

A director once said “All Frosty has to do is walk on stage and she’s a better actor...” I need to tap into that world again, where I can walk on stage, in front of strangers, and capture an audience… this afternoon, seemed so long ago…

*hides under the computer desk and eats sweet potato fries*

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