Saturday, July 31, 2010

Dead and Gone

I have African violets, I’ve been living in B’town for just about 4 years, and they came with me from the city. Why they are still alive no one knows… I don’t like to garden, which is a shame because my parents have a great group of flower and vegetable gardens and always offer me a patch in the spring. I don’t like to dig in the dirt, there’s no desire to plant a small plant and watch it grow into a flower (and then die). I don’t like getting on my knees in the dirt and pulling weeds. (This whole attitude led to badness when my roommate left her window box garden in my care post university (sorry.)

I like to take pictures of flowers. I like to cook with whole vegetables. I appreciate the work that goes into it and know that some people really enjoy it.

There’s an obligation to look after them when the opportunity presents itself. Right now, I’m perfectly happy to walk into the grocery store and pick out my green and red peppers from within the rainbow of a shelf.

I am the spawn of all that is evil; I know.

The reason I bring this up is that my violets were looking pretty bad, I’ve kept up with watering them; pretty much, but I’ve left all the dead leaves on for a very, very long time.

And I wondered how this reflects in my personality, leaving all the old leaves, all the dead ideas on my soul, when the new stuff is trying to shine through. Will it take some of the weight off my shoulders if I trim some of that away? Am I allowed to do that or do I keep holding on, just in case?

What is dead and hanging on? What is new and trying to shine through?

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