I’m not looking to be crushed down by love, to loose my life in the arms of someone else. I’m looking for an equal who helps me breathe on this earth who helps me grow. I don’t want to lose myself to someone else to compromise and get hurt and run away crying. I’ve struggled to find myself the last 20 years. I don’t want to lose that. I don’t want someone to tell me how to live life or that I should conform like the bible says, like he says.
I want to be me and live as me; follow my heart and do what makes it best for me. No one else can see inside me, I don’t believe that anyone can ever know me better than I know myself. I have failed if I can’t see myself for who I am after the work I’ve done. I know what I want to do and what I need to do and if someone can’t accept that it’s not up to me to pound it into their head because I know it’s right for me.
I’m looking for arms to hold me when I sleep. That seems to be one of the things I want. I think about that when I go to bed. Umm but also I know I have the bed to myself and a cat (Izzy) who thinks I’m her kitten and we cuddle before sleep. She takes care of my heart which is a nice trade of for what I have and will do for her for the rest of her life.
I don’t want someone to wake me up from my nightmares in the night, I want to see them to the end and get the message. I want someone who Is not a criminal and someone who makes me excited to be around them. For real, not something that I have to fake. I want someone to write music with and knows that I could love his imperfections as much as I love mine, and lord, I have some imperfections.
I want someone to love me and themselves and work on it every day, like I do. I don’t want to keep looking at men who are single (there aren’t many left) and wonder what I would need to do to make him like me just to get a little attention, but I want to find one that lets me live. I am a complete person. I want some bonus points now, some scene points for playing the life game.